Viva Vallarta! (Part 1)

I hadn't had time to put up a rant about our time in Mexico, thanks in a big part to the sonofabitch who broke in and stole my laptop, but (still without a laptop) I decided to take the time to let all y'all know about our Vacation. I even got them to develop our photos onto CD ROM so I can include some in this update.

The trip started with a fun flight on Air Transat (leaving at 7 AM!). I was expecting very little from them since they are world reknowned for their disorganization and lousy service. They surpassed my lowest expectations. I think you must have to pass a surliness/bitchiness test before you are allowed to become a flight attendant for Transat. Holy attitudes, Batman! We had requested veggie meals from the travel agent and I'd phoned to re-request them a week before the flight. When she brought us our meals we asked if they were veggie. She looked disgusted that we would dare ask and said no. I explained that we'd requested them and her incredibly bitchy response was, "We already gave them all out." Not totally surprised but unsure what to do I re-iterated, "But we requested them." "Well, we already gave them all out," was the response we got. Theovis and I just looked at one another thinking we'd have to go hungry when she snapped, "Do you eat eggs? It's just eggs." How hard would it have been to ask that earlier in the conversation (and in a less unpleasant manner, perhaps)? We got our "just eggs" breakfast and the problem was solved. Did it have to be such an ordeal? Apparently.

We landed in Manzinillo to clear customs before we went on to Puerto Vallarta. I don't really know why they do it this way, but there you go. When the plane hit the ground it somehow jogged a button on the bullhorn they use in case of emergencies, and at least a 30-decibal klaxon went off. No one knew what it was and this thing went on for at least 5 minutes. When we finally taxied to a stop a flight attendant casually went to turn it off. What the hell is wrong with this airline? We exited the plane onto the tarmac and were greeted by a wave of humidity that you could almost see. I've been in steam rooms and this wasn't much different. We waited in line for about 40 minutes outside trying to convince our lungs that they could actually breathe this air. They were pretty dubious. I expected customs to be much scarier than it was but it was just a nice-enough dude who looked at our papers, stamped them and sent us through. They have a system where they completely randomly check bags. You press a button and green means go forward while red means pick up your bag and proceed to the search station. Back on the plane we headed for PV and a week of bliss.

We arrived at our hotel after a long bus ride where the tour guide chatted like crazy and showed us a video (Theovis speculated that it was to distract us from the poverty surrounding us in the small villages). They weren't kidding when they said that it was outside Puerto Vallarta itself. It was actually in the next state. We were greeted in the hotel lobby by people bearing drinks and I thought, "I could get used to this!" We checked in and found our AIR CONDITIONED room. Yipee! We'd made it!